


Even If

by beanfriedfritters



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Couch Cuddles, Gen, Guilty Peter Parker, Mentioned Skip Westcott, Parent Tony Stark, Precious Peter Parker, Tony Stark Gets a Hug, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Trans Peter Parker, but its not a big plotline just how i hc him, but when is he not, but wrongly like it’s not his fault but he thinks it is, eventually, i actually love pepper i promise, im crap at dialogue so suffer with me, im just picking up on the kinda shittier parts of pepperony, im mean, its not her fault, um so you can either read may and peppers relationship as romantic or as platonic idm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-16
Updated: 2019-04-27
Packaged: 2019-09-20 12:23:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17022558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beanfriedfritters/pseuds/beanfriedfritters
Summary: Tony was given a choice, a choice between Peter and Pepper.He chose one, and now he has to reap the aftermath.otherwisetony is emotionally stunted. pepper is better as a friend (in this au). peter is a cinnamon roll who i will Snuggle Viciously. and rhodey is perfect.





	1. decisions decisions decisions

**Author's Note:**

> k so i love pep seriously read my other fics theyre all about her (cheeky self-spon ;) ) but honestly there are times when im like... shit darling no. cause like they just kinda give up? on each other? like, often? and i just want to pick up on that. also totally ignoring that scene in sm:hc where pepper sees pete but tony and her are still engaged. just for sake of my shitty plot :)
> 
> have a nice read of the first chapter kids - i will probs never finish this.

“Choose, Mr. Stark.” The man’s teeth were a dull yellow as he grinned at him, “Your beloved fiancée, or this worthless kid?” Pepper’s face was wrinkled with pain as the man held her hair roughly.

Tony twisted his head away from the beast before him to look at this kid.

Tony wanted to smack himself. Of course. Of course. The random kid the brute picked up had to be Peter Fucking Parker. Tony didn’t know what he’d do. Until he did. Pepper’s eyes stared at him intensely. He winced, and she nodded tightly, swallowing any words she wanted to scream at him. She knew who he’d choose. Even if she didn’t understand why. Even if it made no logical sense. Not to her.

“Pete,” he held out a hand to the whimpering boy, “Come here.” Peter looked up, his eyes glazed and mouth slightly open. His small frame shook, his shoulders quivering. The kid put his hand out weakly. Pepper’s eyes slid shut, a single tear falling down her cheek.

“What’s this?” The brute smiled wickedly, “Do you know him?” His smile transformed into a malicious grin, “Perhaps I should keep this pretty fella with me too?” His hand stroked Peter’s sweaty curls. The teen flinched away from the slimy paw that slid down his neck. A fingertip slipped under Tony’s kid’s t-shirt, and something in Tony snapped, all thoughts of anything else but protect his kid with all he had was lost in his incandescent rage. 

Even Pepper.

~~~~~~

The next thing he knew, he was sat on the muddy floor with a trembling Peter in his lap, the brute’s unconscious body lying limply on the other side of the room. Pepper slouched against the nearby wall, watching him through shrewd, calculating eyes. Her feet were bare, and she looked shaken up. A broken whimper left Peter’s lips, and Tony’s attention flipped, straight to Peter. He pulled the kid’s head into the crook of his neck and rocked them slowly, soothingly, back and forth. Peter’s sobs softened to fragmented gasps.

“I – I don’t understand. Who – who is he?” Pepper’s voice was soft, almost not there at all, except that it was. It was the loudest thing.

Tony’s dark eyes slammed shut, pulling Peter closer unconsciously. He stayed silent.

Pepper’s next words were broken, torn by her confusion, “I’m… I’m your,” a pause, “fiancée, Tony. Surely he can’t -”

“Well he does. I’m sorry but he does.” His tenor was firm yet apologetic, “He’s my kid, Pep. And he comes – he comes first.” He chanced a look at her, saw her hurt expression, and quickly looked down again.

“Then why I have I never met him? Who is he? Why does he triumph over – over me?” Her voice was not arrogant, nor was it rude or angry – simply confused and hurt. And that made Tony’s heart ache more then he cared to admit.

“He’s. He is my son in all but blood Pep. I – he – I can’t let him get hurt.”

“But why have I never met him?!” She was shouting, Tony didn’t know what to do, he put his hands over Peter’s ears, unconsciously protecting the kid from his own fiancée. And Pepper noticed, her eyes tracking the movement, her lips trembled, “I just don’t… I don’t understand. Please make me understand.” Tears fell down her cheeks. She wiped at them harshly.

Tony said nothing – what could he say? Her shoulders shook with a heart wrenching sob.

Pepper stood up straight, her frame still convulsing, yet she walked as calmly as she could to the broken in door.

Just before she left his line of sight, Tony watched her wipe at her eyes this time more gently, less effective.

Tony pulled Peter closer, feeling numb.

all your fault

didn’t ever deserve her. 

told you so 

told you so 

told you so


	2. The Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Petey and Tony need a recovery time, and Rhodey is a fuckin angel who both of them adore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are very minor implications to past sexual abuse by a bastard called Skip Westcott in this chapter. So just please don’t hurt yourself :) xx

Guilt clawed at Peter. His throat closed tight around a swallow.  
A shadow had fallen over Tony Stark since the incident. And Peter Parker was the cause.

He had let himself get captured. And they had forced Tony to choose between his fiancé and a nobody from Queens. Tony had chosen the nobody. 

Peter shouldn’t have allowed the man to get him so worked up, but he reminded him so much of Skip. Skip who - who had done things to him. 

It shouldn’t have shaken him up so much. He was Spider-man. Spider-man didn’t get scared.

But Peter Parker did. Peter Parker was weak. Peter Parker was useless.

——

A tap on his shoulder broke Peter out of his dark thoughts. 

He turned. Tony’s tired face smiled at him, eyes shadowed by dark bags, lines by his mouth where they never were before. 

“Tony-“ he paused, “I’m so - so sorry...” A single tear fell down Peter’s cheek. 

Tony tilted his head, smiled sadly, and said, “It’s fine, Peter. It’s not your fault.” He reached out, pulling the distraught teen close. 

Peter let out a sob, arms tightening fast around the man, “But if i hadn’t - I’m Spider-“

He’s cut off by Tony pulling back just enough to put a hand over the boy’s mouth and to give a stern look, “Peter stop. You’re just hurting yourself thinking about what ifs.” He let go of his mouth and pulled the kid close again. 

The boy opened his mouth against Tony’s shoulder, going to speak, but the man just tightened his hand around the back of his neck. Peter bit down on Tony’s t-shirt, sobs wracking his body once again.

——

They ended up on the sofa, Tony slouched - half against the arm half against the backrest, and Peter curled up next to him, face buried in Tony’s chest, fast asleep. Tony ran a hand through the boy’s hair while deep in thought. 

Tony knew that he and Pepper had once found incomparable comfort in each other than with anyone else, but lately, Tony found that when he was feeling shaky, his finger would scroll passed Peppers name in his contacts, and click on Peter’s. And he had noticed that Pepper saw May more than him the past year.

Maybe the Parker’s had a special brand of comfort that called to them. Both of them. 

Maybe it wouldn’t have been that big of a thing. Maybe had each other not been their second choice, maybe had they been their first, they could have stayed together. 

But they just couldn’t. They wouldn’t ever be their first choices again. Peter would always be Tony’s first choice, his first priority, from now and forever on. 

And maybe May would be Pepper’s. 

Or maybe Pepper would be Pepper’s first choice.

Because even if they went back, even if they rewound time, Tony wouldn’t change a thing. 

He’d still pick Peter. He’d still pick his son. 

Peter shuffled around.

Broken out of his thoughts, Tony looked down at Peter resting on his chest. Brown, doe eyes blearily watched him. The boy blinked slowly. Tony spoke quietly, “Hey, buddy. You awake now?” 

“Mmph-“ A long yawn, “Nooo...” Peter dripped his head back down, and snuggled his face into the older man’s chest. Tony chuckled, and scraped his nails gently against the scalp of Peter’s head.

Peter shivered, smiling slightly, “That feels really weird...” He let out a little laugh when the man just did it again. 

——

Peter changed before movie night; taking his binder off, pulling on the loosest, comfiest jumper in his closet, and a soft pair of joggers. 

As he walked towards the kitchen, he could hear Tony talking to someone. He strained to hear who the other person was... Colonel Rhodes! He was back early!

Peter picked up his pace, tripping over his feet as he entered the room. 

Tony looked happier already. Colonel Rhodes laughed and flicked Tony on the side on the head while the shorter man beamed up at him.

Peter grinned, and rushed over to them. The boy started to ramble about what movie they should watch that night, going off on a tangent about the newly announced James Bond actor, to which Tony and Rhodey just smiled, and nodded at each other, silently agreeing that all would be ok, even if they were one short of their normal movie nights. 

Everything would be fine, because Peter and Tony had each other. And that’s all that really ever mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rami Malek is the new James Bond villain btw. Which will be brilliant. Because I adore Rami Malek. And James Bond. So.


End file.
